Friday, 18 October 2013

Heat Of The Moment

People have a choice:
they can either wear their jumpers or eat them.


Thursday, 17 October 2013

Space Monkey

That Roy Hodgson's got a bloody cheek if you ask me.
I certainly took offence.


Saturday, 12 October 2013

The Price Is Wrong

We'd love to sell our Royal Mail shares
but unfortunately they've been lost in the post.


Tuesday, 8 October 2013


This is a full-length bus tour of Narnia -
so bagsy me be the Wardrobe.


Monday, 7 October 2013

Sunday, 6 October 2013

The Marxist Marksman

Are you absolutely certain that Paul Dacre
will be driving along this road, Mr Miliband?


Picture courtesy of Daily Mail

Saturday, 5 October 2013


Personally I don't believe it's hypocritical
to write a fawning begging letter to Mr Dacre
and then to publicly slag him off
when he doesn't give me a job.


Friday, 4 October 2013

Summertime Blues

The World Cup will be played in Qatar.
It will be played in summer.
It will be played on XBox with FIFA 14.


Wednesday, 2 October 2013

He Ain't Heavy He's My Dad

The reason that it falls to me, rather
than my brother, to defend our father is that
David doesn't read the Daily Mail.


Tuesday, 1 October 2013

The Dough Bringer

Do I use a breadmaker?
Several actually. They all work in the City.